I Already Knew

First teacher interview
I drove 50 miles
wore
grey slacks
cropped at the ankle
pearly pink pointy shoes
pastel pink dress shirt
under a grey blazer
three quarter sleeve
I thought I looked professional

When they asked if I had any questions
about the district
I thought for a minute
this is a small town,
it seems sheltered,
did I blab too much about being Latina?
did I clarify my desire to make a difference enough?
did I stop being nervous by now?
I wish I would stop sweating.

-Since you asked me what make me different from other applicants, and why you should hire me, then I want to know what makes your district so different, so unique, why should I work for you?

Maybe I was too forward
the prinicipal glanced at the superintendent
the counselor in cut off jeans with holes and a tank top smiled at me,

The principal,
female,
elderly,
straight faced
no emotions,
I couldn't tell if she was mad or bored or annoyed,

"Well, we have high scores on the TAKS test, our community is very close, we have a dress code."
She paused as if deciding to continue then stopped talking altogether.

The interview was concluded;
I already knew
that gut feeling that tells you,
No, I didn't get the job.

I stepped back to the outer office,
the secretary typed away frantically,
I don't like this place anyway.

They're too quiet,
like where is their spirit?
It's okay, I know God has something better.
I grabbed my pink folder of resumes and college transcripts,
-Thank you for your time; I have to get to class now. I am a grad student you know, always wanting to learn more, that's my most valuable asset.

I drove back to Victoria,
preparing to go to class,
that night I received another phone call,
while I was visiting Tony at work.

I did not recongize the number,
but still answered it.
It was the human resources director from another school,
I already knew,
as soon as I pressed end on my cell phone and slid it shut,
I am going to get this job.

Before even going to the interview,
I already knew.
They smiled while they asked me questions,
still keeping a level of professionalism,
accompanied by that warmth
that says "we like you; we could see you at our school."
I paused to consider
the pay scale was low, state standard,
the school is small,
only about fifteen - twenty minutes away from home,
the students will be 4th graders; that'll be my homeroom.
They're going to throw in a class of 5th graders and 6th graders, too.
Hmm, that's a lot of planning for a first year teacher,
but I won't get bored teaching the same thing all day.
Each student will be different; different ages, different genders, different hormones.
Hay Dios! Can I handle that?

I signed the dotted line by the "x,"
felt a new air of confidence,
they really appreciated my passion, my energy, my desire to help the students,
going beyond the "calling" of being a teacher,
because we don't just teach,
we have to be social workers, psychologists, parents, sisters,

As I was leaving my interview,
the human resource director beamed at me
"you're going to be such an excellent role model for those girls."
I smiled back,
- I will do my best.
I already knew...
this is where I belong.